Good Decision

"It's really between Liz and Michael Jackson. I'm gonna have to go ahead and pick Liz."--Andrew Alesso

Surprise, Surprise

"Obama was not my first kiss."--Liz Thatcher

Annoying Creaminess

"Ours is a *cultured* ice cream truck--it's still annoying."--Kelly Bunch

Liquidated Liquid

"You can't break my heart. It's liquid; it melted the day I met you."--Beckie

"I can break liquid."--Savannah

Be Cool, Be Cleansed

"All the cool people love soap."--Andrew Alesso

Elephant-Induced Insanity

"Do you have another pin? This elephant's driving me crazy."--Liz Thatcher

Home Demonomics

"I was thinking maybe we were having a seance."--Anonymous Home Economics Professor

There will be no poop in heaven.

"True story, my house is not going to have a bathroom in it.  I don't want to know if or when my wife poops. "

--Ankoma Pharr

Nez Perce, Dixon Style

"I'm piercing your nose tonight, Anna."--Liz

A Monkey From The Start

"I was about 7 pounds, so I was about average."--Katie

"I was about 6-9."--Kayla

"I was a Sea Monkey, actually."--Liz