The DLE Bathroom

"Pooping is so awkward" - Kelly

"Why? Everyone does it." - Haley

"I know, but it's just weird to think of certain people pooping. Like John MacArthur." - Kelly

Biblical Proximity

"Hey there, you guys need to leave room for the Holy Spirit" - Kelly Bunch

"We like to leave room for a thin-line Bible" - James

BusCom Sales Reports

"And obviously God is pleased in this" - Jenn Galdamez

"Yeah because He likes to chew gum." - Haley

"No, I'm sure His breath always smells good. He's God." - Jenn Galdamez

HTDs

"Are they gonna get sores from that?"

"Yeah, Hugging Transmitted Diseases."

Used of God

"Honestly, Katie, I think God is using these goldfish."--Haley

Romantic Ruination

"Apparently Prince William landed a helicopter in his girlfriend's garden."--Katie
"Why?"--Aida
"I dunno. I guess to be romantic or something."--Katie
"Haha. It'd be funny if she was like, 'What are you doing?! You just killed my begonias!!!!'"--Aida

Piney Truth

"As they say, 'Honesty is like a pinecone.'"--Erica

Mythical Horror/Mango Misconception

"When I picture dragon skins, I think of nasty, scaly dandruff chunks that are larger than my face."--Haley

Anointing

"I would like to pour water over your head. May I do it?"--Erica

"Uh, I'm gonna go with a big fat no."--Haley

Confession of a Dixonite

"It turns me on when guys talk about their sin" - Anonymous

Late Night Lake Activities

"Our goal was to look insane so that the weird boys wouldn't talk to us" - Lealia

"Yeah, I mean who wants to hit on a mermaid!?" - Haley

"A Merman!" - Rebekah

Wish

"I hope it has fun singing animals inside!" - Lealia Ulavale

Soul Thieves

"Next time just tell them that you are part indian and you believe pictures will steal your soul" - Lealia Ulavale

MJ

"Michael Jackson is the more readily accessible version of the eccentricity" - Cameron Knox

Those Boys...

Regarding Slight: "We get all the women."--Daniel Dibble

Unique Self-Observation

"I feel like a crappy individual. I'm nerdy, cruel and feminine."--Daniel Dibble

Quite an Assortment

"Now all I have is meat cleavers and casinos."--Jon Colaco

How?...What?...

"Hey Haley, follow your heart. And maybe your hips!"--Kelly Bunch

Hey, She Can Spell!

"But there's no G in Dixon!"--Kelly Bunch

Pick me! Pick me!

"Who wants to cuddle a hand grenade?"--Kelly Bunch

Really?

"All I see is hair and children!"--Haley King

Fowl Storage

"Maybe a woodpecker tried to store an acorn in your shin" - Spencer Carpenter

Mechanical Indecency

"They put it all in the magical naked machine" - Katie A

Hand Odor

Sitting in our dorm room:

"Why does my hand smell like.... *sniff sniff* my dog?" - Rebekah Tsang

Concerning the Gift of Celibacy

"I don't have it. And if I do, I'm returning it!" - Heather Walsh

Fruitfulness

"Hey hey hey.... no one's takin' fruit out of nobody" - Kyle Ruggles

Wiggly

"He'll try to wiggle out of our arms!...He'll escape!... First he'll escape, now he won't let go of me."--Haley